Words

Charles Henry Hope writes to his daughter in 1940.

Words can be the most powerful tool that we have at our disposal.  We saw this with great clarity during the last election cycle.  With our instantaneously connected social networks, we saw words used as both a way to lift up our spirits, hopes, and dreams, and in the next instant, as a pointed jousting lance, with the purpose of neatly disposing of an opponent.  I must admit, I’ve done both; but the feeling of content lasts much longer when I’ve used my words in a positive way.

My 83 year old mother recently brought over a copy of a letter that her father had written to one of her older sisters who was away at boarding school.  These words from 73 years ago were precious to my mother, so much so that she sent a copy to each of her four daughters.  She loved the way that her father captured the essence of each of his children in a few succinct words or phrases. It brought back memories of things she had forgotten, or things that were skirting on the edges of her mind; the precious memories of a time before her life was indelibly changed by a forced evacuation during WWII.  But those are words for another story.

I am in awe of my two daughters who have taken their words into song.  They can turn a phrase that will make you think deeply, or in another direction that will absolutely YANK at your heartstrings.  Their words will make you nod in agreement, or sigh with the feelings of love you didn’t know you were harboring.  Alena (Syverson) once wrote a song about the Bosnian conflict called Beautiful Blind Followers.  It was the song that Laresa (Syverson) later sang, noting that it was the song that sparked her interest to write her own songs.  Beautiful blind followers with crowded thoughts and frightened minds – took their chances on twisted lives; wasted their time.  Occupied dead souls keep their silence of thousands, of millions disappearing into the void…

I love that you can put down words, let them sit awhile, and think of better ways of putting them together to better convey what you are thinking or feeling.  My esteemed friend Jerah Chadwick is a wonderful poet, who after living in the Aleutians for 26 years, was well known for the way he integrated local culture and environment into his writing.  In After the Aleut, Jerah turns a phrase that comes back to me time and time again.  Say a woman once stepped from volcano steam, or a man from the sea, desiring to live among us.  I appreciate his ability to take pieces of oral storytelling and integrate those pieces into a contemporary conglomeration of great depth and feeling that speaks to me in ways that it doesn’t speak to other readers.  A true gift.

Words, so personal but so public.  Words, that for good or bad, shape lives.  As I get older I find that I choose my words much more carefully than I used to do.  But once I have chosen those words, I use them with abandon – without fear of outside opinions.  I find as I get older that I prefer listening to words that have been chosen well; those that can bring harmony to conflict.  Those words that give purpose to a life well lived.  Much like when Laresa sings in Light – as the years go rolling by we’ll stand beside this rising tide, we’ll plant our seeds so they won’t die and sail into the afterlife. Where maybe things won’t seem so bad, we won’t regret the lives we’ve had, and maybe that’s where I’ll see you the way I’ve always wanted to.

Hunkering down

~

When you live in Alaska there are just certain things that you expect.  You expect the long days of summer when the sun barely sets before coming above the horizon again.  You expect to spend a majority of your time hunting and gathering from May through October.  You don’t know when, but you expect that first dusting of snow on the mountains, more commonly known as termination dust.  And you expect it to be cold.  In the Aleutians, we also expect wind.

February was called Qisagunax^ by the indigenous people of the Aleutians prior to 1834.  This means famine.  February was the month when you were gaining about 4 minutes of daylight per day.  It was the month when you had already braved the storms of November, December, and January.  It was the month when you were coming to the end of some of your subsistence foods.  So food was scarce.  The communities were hungry.  It was a time when you needed to get out there and find something to eat again.

It is amazing that February is also the month during our long winters that can have some of the most beautiful weather.  Perhaps my ancestors knew this about February, so they were not particularly careful about their food stocks.  They did like to party and were generous to a fault.  Perhaps they knew they could count on the most gorgeous, brilliant sunny days in February, when the tide was out really low.  And the winds abated.  They could get out in their iqyan and fish, or hunt for that stray sea mammal.  Or access the tidepools for delicacies like sea urchins, mussels, clams, octopus, limpets, chitons, and seaweed.  Then they would hunker down when those north winds picked up again, coating everything in ice from the sea spray.

On days like these ones, I like to pull a fish out of the freezer and enjoy the fruits of our labors from the summer months.  I like to be warm and toasty in my little home, not caring what is going on outside my doors.  Like the windows, everything has a hazy, muted feeling of being cut off from the world.  Especially if the wind is blowing and your ability to hear anything besides the wind is gone.  Yes….just hunkering down and enjoying my solitude.

Dedication and Procrastination

~

I am a master at dedication.  Over the  years I have dedicated myself to performing major feats.  Raising three children on my own.  Coordinating a summer culture camp.  Planning a secret anniversary party for my parents with my sisters, where practically the whole town was invited, and it remained a secret.  Many, many feats.  So this morning, when I still have over 100 chocolates to dip, why am I sitting here procrastinating?  I will be mad at myself later when I am running around trying to get them packaged up.  I will really be pissed when I’m trying to squeeze in time to make that homemade ginger ale.  Why is it that I am a master at dedication and procrastination?  And look at that fingerprint on the peppermint…guess I’ll just have to eat that one.